Yo mamma so fat

Her mailbox says Home of the Whopper. Last time she saw 90210 it was on the scale!!!! When she walked in front of the TV you missed 5 minutes of your show. when truckers pass her by they say to themselves "who the hell's driving that rig" When her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up Her nickname is "DAMN" She eats Wheat Thicks. We're in her right now People jog around her for exercise She went to the movies and sat next to everyone She has been declared a natural habitat for Condors You haveta roll over twice to get off her... She was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for then new world She lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy When you get on top of her your ears pop! When she has sex, she has to give directions! She goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!" When she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!" She had to go to Sea World to get baptized She got to iron her pants on the driveway She put on her lipstick with a paint-roller She got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets When she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th When she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too The highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn" When she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE! When she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please" When she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo. She fell in love and broke it. When she gets on the scale it says to be continued. When she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock. Her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs! She's got her own area code! She looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon! God couldn't light Earth till she moved! NASA has to orbit a satellite around her! Whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in! When she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago... She's got AMTRAK written on her leg. Even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction! Her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky! You have to roll her ass in flour and look for the wet spot to ---- her! I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the ------- good side! She wakes up in sections! When she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER! She sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of George Washington's nose./li> She was mistaken for God's bowling ball! She rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar! When she lies on the beach no one else gets sun! When she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell! When she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!! She's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book! That her senior pictures had to be aerial views! She's on both sides of the family! Every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil! She fell and made the Grand Canyon! She sat on the beach and Green peace threw her in! That when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips! Even her clothes have stretch marks! She has a wooden leg with a kickstand! She has to use a VCR as a beeper! She broke her leg, and gravy poured out! When she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearing tights! She got hit by a parked car! They have to grease the bath tub to get her out! She has a run in her blue-jeans! When she gets on the scale it says to be continued. When she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo. They use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping When they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground. When she back up she beep. She has to buy two airline tickets. When she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again. She influences the tides. That when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas. She broke her leg and gravy fell out. The animals at the zoo feed her. She was baptized at Marine World. When she dances at a concert the whole band skips. The Aids quilt wouldn't cover her She stands in two time zones. It takes her two trips to haul ass You have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through When the ----- goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps. That she cant tie her own shoes. Sets off car alarms when she runs. She cant reach her back pocket. When she wears a Malcomn X T-shirt, helicopters try to land on her back! She lays on the beach and green peace tried to push her back in the water She uses redwoods to pick her teeth The only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures She put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard. She stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles. She uses a mattress for a tampon. That when she sits on the beach, Green peace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean..... That she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse. She hoola-hooped the super bowl. She was baptized in the ocean. They tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it. When she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?" When she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow! That when was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks. The National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!! We went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.